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redfiona99Title: For My Wings I've Been Searching
Author: Red Fiona
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters; CLAMP do. No money being made from this.
Fandom: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle
Character: Fai and the rest of the TRC gang
Ratings/Warning: PG-12 gen fic with background Fai/Kurogane. Set post series so some spoilers.
Notes: Written for the lgbtfest 2013 prompt "Crossover: His Dark Materials fusion with any fandom, It’s hard to be closeted when people can tell what you are just by looking at your daemon."
Summary: When they travel to different worlds, they try to blend in as best they can. They normally don't manage it, adventure and incident seeks them out. Fai wants to know what it is that makes them stand out on this world.
~~~~
It wasn't Hanshin, with the kudan, but it was something similar. When they'd fallen into the world, their animal companions had arrived with them. These animals were them, but not them, separate personalities, somehow linked. Exactly how it all worked and what it all meant was beyond all of them, even Sayoran.
Sayoran's daemon, and the creatures were most insistent that that was what they were called, no matter what is sounded like to the travellers's ears, was a small cricket called Miu. It was lucky that one of their daemons was small, so that the daemon could hide and they could pretend Mokona was someone's daemon. They'd have a hard time explaining Mokona otherwise. They had a hard time explaining Mokona anyway, with a lot of people looking questioningly at Mokona, because whatever Mokona was, Mokona wasn't any sort of animal found in this world. Fai's daemon, Dimochka, was a medium-sized bird, grey plumage with a black-and-white head. When Dimochka flew, it was poetry in motion, but quite often, he was just as happy to land on the back of Kurogane's daemon and be carried everywhere.
Kurogane's daemon was large enough that he wouldn't have noticed the weight of his passenger. Lizard was a large, well, he was a lizard, with big, strong legs and a thoroughly vicious bite. The others had tried to tell Kurogane that Lizard's name couldn't be Lizard, that he had to have a real name, but both daemon and man turned round with the same look of aggravated disdain. Apparently, Lizard's name really could be Lizard.
It's probably just as well that Kurogane and Lizard are quite so similar, it would make it easier for Kurogane to fight alongside him. Not that there had been any cause for fighting yet, but Kurogane was always alert to the possibility.
Sayoran found the whole thing fascinating. Fai enjoyed watching him try to understand the local customs. The innkeeper's daughter, at that age where all anyone wanted was to be away from *here*, no matter where here was, and to be somewhere else, anywhere else, enjoyed telling Sayoran all about the daemons. Sayoran had learnt enough on their travels not to reveal straight away that they came from somewhere without these shadow-forms, instead gently easing the information from the girl with tales of "comparative folklore" and "ethnology" and other such things that Fai knew nothing of.
The innkeeper’s daughter explained how the animals were part of them, that their forms had some meaning, but not always an obvious one, and that the personalities of the daemons reflect their human halves. When they first arrived, Fai wondered if it was some hidden facet that the daemons embodied, trying not to think too hard about what the bird flying free might mean about him, but it was more complicated, more symbiotic than that. And obviously, their relationships to their daemons wouldn't be the same as someone born on this world, they hadn't grown up with them, grown up intertwined with a second voice, something Fai's missed out on twice.
The innkeeper's daughter's description of the daemons as reflections made more sense the longer they stayed here. Miu was so small she could go almost anywhere, insatiably curious like Sayoran, but without those cares that weighed him down. Lizard and Kurogane might both have pretended that each was an extension of the other, that there was no difference between them, that had Lizard named Kurogane he would have called him Human, but Lizard was that slight bit more relaxed than Kurogane, willing to let things go, willing to sleep in in the mornings in the way the ninja would never allow himself.
Fai knew they made an odd group, and heard the girl trying to explain that to Sayoran without saying any of the words she either doesn't know, shouldn't know or fears are hurtful. Despite the girl's attempts, Fai heard what people say about him, and the others. Thinking that Mokona is Sayoran's daemon, people said that of course Sayoran has a peculiar daemon, look at who he's travelling with. What's a boy like him doing travelling with men like that?
Fai wanted to ask how people knew, people normally made assumptions that he contributed to with the Puppy and Kitty thing, but that was under his control. He feared they may have been obvious through breaking some taboo without knowing it, and that would never do. Sayoran's gentle questioning of the innkeeper's daughter provided the answer to this also. It's the touching of daemons, both the touching of another's daemon or the touching of two daemons, it's a sign, at the very least of closeness. Apparently, even brothers didn't touch each other's daemons, while Dimochka did spend an awful lot of time resting on Lizard's shoulder for a bird who should have been in flight or on his human partner's shoulder if he wanted a rest. Fai could feel it when Dimochka landed on Lizard's shoulder, felt a thrill that ran right through him, and a similar sort of feeling when Kurogane looked mostly-mock daggers at him while feeding Dimochka bites of any seafood they had. "The damn bird doesn't even need to eat," Kurogane would say, his loud and angry words entirely undermined by how careful he was to not disturb Dimochka from whatever perch he'd found, even if that perch was Kurogane's shoulder. So yes, Fai could see why people know without them saying anything.
Fai wondered if they should stop, if he should stop, if he even could stop Dimochka doing whatever he pleased, because the daemons are not under their direct control, not like that. And it is Dimochka who makes the contact with Kurogane, with Lizard, not Fai.
Fai asked Dimochka his opinion, because he thinks that's only fair. Dimochka says he could stop, if Fai wanted, but he said it in such a way that Fai could tell he would, if Fai asked him to, but not because Dimochka himself wanted to stop. Fai didn't want to stop either. Kurogane, despite the bluster, seemed to enjoy contact. Not *just* like that, Kurogane was a very physical person, in a way Fai isn't, with people who aren't Kurogane, Sayoran or Sakura. Fai wondered if it was a ninja thing, all that training together, living together, fighting together. He wouldn't know, Kurogane was the only warrior he knew. Fai's also aware that he's the exact opposite, avoiding contact, even in crowded, busy places, bending with the flow of the crowd so no one quite touches him. After they were put in the tower, Ashura was the only person who touched him, and even that had been years later. The idea of making Dimochka live like that made Fai heartsick.
So he asked Kurogane what they should do. Of course Kurogane had noticed the looks they get, Kurogane notices things, but Kurogane also hadn't said anything about them. He tended not to, unless he thought what he said would make a difference.
"Why should we stop?"
Fai tried to explain that it will stop the looks they receive, but Kurogane's answer to that is "so what?" No, Kurogane had never hidden anything he is, except maybe that heart of his under anger, muscle and glare. He'd never changed what he is to suit someone else. It's one of those moments when Fai realised he knew nothing of Kurogane's Nihon, beyond their brief visits there, and Kurogane's past beyond what they found out in Rekort, because Fai hadn’t asked as part of some unspoken pact to let the past be. Maybe in Nihon they really don't care, or maybe, and Fai has a skinny boy's memories even though he had been under Ashura's protection, no one has ever bothered Kurogane about because Kurogane would have punched them into next week. Maybe Kurogane's never needed to hide anything.
Still, next time the group travelled out and around the town, and they received such a look, Kurogane was careful to turn to the man looking at them and ask if there was anything he wanted. The way Kurogane said it, there's threat and the promise of violence. He turned to the man in synchronisation with Lizard and for the first time Fai wondered whether Lizard has poison in his bite.
It didn’t stop the looks, but it did mean people are less obvious about it, which is all Fai could have hoped for.
They stay longer than expected on the world, Sayoran was searching for a book, and they were having to search every library they can find, because there are no collectors’ almanacs. The world is in that time, after the printing press but before the steam engine, so most books are in the libraries of nobles, and what's called a city is only a large town, but even so, public libraries are forming. They searched in patterns, one week here, one week there, but always returning to the inn they originally stayed in.
Sometimes the innkeeper's daughter came with them as a guide, and when she didn't, they try to bring her small gifts from the towns, the nearest she will get to visiting some of them.
The travelling meant that the looks and stares were back, the same expression in each new place.
One time it was worse than looks. Fai was tying the horses up in a stable when three men set up on him. He can guess why they're violent, and he can guess why they chose him to attack.
Obviously, they didn’t know that Fai wasn't anything like as defenceless as he looked.
Dimochka got his talons into them, as a look of horror spread on their faces. It is horror, not fear or pain, because Fai knew that on this world, after a child reaches eight or nine or so, daemons remained fixed. The yobs attacked a man and a tern. They faced a vampire and a vulture.
The fight was over quickly, long before Kurogane and Sayoran raced around the corner, having heard the unmistakable sound of violence and guessing that Fai might be involved. Dimochka had not changed back by the time they arrive, blood coated his talons, golden feathers out as he checked those for splashes of blood. Dimochka muttered to himself, hoping that when he changed back it would clean him automatically, otherwise he will need a bath.
Fai wasn’t sure what to expect, because Dimochka hadn't ever changed while the others have been in the room. Fai had always known the ability was there, he could feel the urge to shift running under both their skins when he fed from Kurogane, and maybe Kurogane and Lizard had seen Dimochka's feathers turn golden and beak sharpen out of the corner of their eyes and written it off as the effects of the feeding, but this was the first time Dimochka had completely changed.
Sayoran stopped running, made several sensible conclusions, filing the knowledge away as data about how daemons work, but other than that he behaved completely normally, saying hello to Dimochka and helping to tie the villains up. There will be a local sheriff, a town this size is bound to have one. Even if he disapproves of the travellers, he will probably have enough sense of justice to lock the men up. Their group will say Kurogane did all the damage to the men, and would stick to that story even if the men disagreed. It was for the best, and, after all, who'd believe Fai and little Dimochka could do that?
Kurogane picked up a few of the feather that Dimochka left scattered around. Fai was scared to look at Kurogane, scared that this will be a secret too far, but when Kurogane looked at him it was with awe and wonder, not horror and revulsion. Lizard looked less impressed but that's probably more because Dimochka in this form is too heavy to carry easily and has just landed on Lizard’s right shoulder. Lizard is like Kurogane and won't admit it so he didn't say anything when Dimochka landed on him, because Dimochka is like Fai and enjoys teasing Lizard.
Several worlds later, Kurogane made Fai a gift of those feathers, set in a necklace, but that was in the future. Now, they had almost two months more on this world before Sayoran even found the book he'd been looking for, never mind finished reading it. But Sayoran does finish it eventually, and the second book it points to. Combined, the books tell him more than they knew before, nothing practical yet, but theoretically, if they found the right conditions, they could reanimate the clones without it killing anyone else. The second book even made some suggestions about what those conditions were, and how they might test if a world has them. After so long of only finding what Kurogane called "half-assed suggestions", it was more than they could have hoped for.
It means they have to leave, to go looking for the sort of world the books provide directions towards. They tested this world; it doesn't fit the criteria so they'll have to move on.
Fai was ambivalent. This world had its advantages yes, but he wasn’t sure he wanted those two children who they had travelled with for so long to live on world where people are attacked just for being different. And the looks, the looks might have been worse than the violence. Even before he became a vampire, Fai thinks he could have handled the violence better than the looks. Then again, as Kurogane would say "every world has idiots", and this world was, idiots aside, pleasant and peaceful. And it had their daemons. Once they left, Fai would be, well alone wasn't the right word, because Sayoran, Sakura and Kurogane would all do their best to make sure he was never alone again, but it wouldn't be the same as him and Dimochka, which itself wasn't the same as what he'd had once before, but it was as close as he'd ever get. They would be leaving that behind.
But it must be done. They promised Sakura they would travel with Sayoran, they promised the kid that he'd never have to travel alone. Fai couldn't make a liar out of Kurogane for his own desires.
Mokona turned away when they start to leave, eyes closed because Mokona understood that this was a private moment between each traveller and their daemon. Fai could feel the separation start, a feeling of distance, pulling apart somewhere deep inside. He had no idea what to say, but he knew he had to say something to Dimochka, want to say something, because even if Fai would be the only person who knew, goodbyes mattered.
"I ... Thank you. Thank you for this time we have spent together. I will miss you."
"Miss me? I'm not going anywhere." Fai felt Dimochka's smile as much as he saw it. "I've always been here, and I'll always be there with you. Look at the wide-open sky, and you'll find me."
Fai carried that with him in his heart, through the other worlds they visit, searching for one with all the right qualities. He made sure to take the time to look up to the horizon, especially when it all got too much, which it did sometimes, and he felt it - the feeling of flight, the sense of air under his wings - both things he could never have experienced and yet he has.
He kept Dimochka there in his heart, because Dimochka was right, he'll always be there.
~~~~
End notes: I didn't want to write this as "character has always had a daemon", because I think that would change the character so much and how their society does things. The best Daemon fusion fics take that into account (brief pause here to rec Andraste's Dr. Who daemon fusion fic), and someone else could probably do really interesting thing with the prompt taken that way, but I wanted to look at it from the direction of what would the characters notice as the major difference.
Which meant I had to use characters who could world/reality hop.
Once I'd decided that, the TRC crowd sprang to mind.
Lizard was the first daemon I decided on. I got a flash of Kurogane and a lizard, big squat shoulders and all, moving in sync, and that was that. Lizard, as you might have guessed, is a Komodo dragon.
I knew Syoran's daemon had to be small, and a cricket was a clear choice after that. Her name is Miu which means feather, because I like to keep the theme from the manga.
Fai's daemon was always going to be a bird. I was desperately looking for a very feathery bird that could flap. Looking through Russian birds, because Fai's speech bubbles are filled with Cyrillic when Mokona isn't present, I found the Aleutian tern (which is what Dimochka is most of the time) and thought, "yeah, that's it," then I saw a picture of a Himalayan vulture and went, "oh!" So yes, you won't like Dimochka when he gets angry, and that helped set up some of what plot there is.
Author: Red Fiona
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters; CLAMP do. No money being made from this.
Fandom: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle
Character: Fai and the rest of the TRC gang
Ratings/Warning: PG-12 gen fic with background Fai/Kurogane. Set post series so some spoilers.
Notes: Written for the lgbtfest 2013 prompt "Crossover: His Dark Materials fusion with any fandom, It’s hard to be closeted when people can tell what you are just by looking at your daemon."
Summary: When they travel to different worlds, they try to blend in as best they can. They normally don't manage it, adventure and incident seeks them out. Fai wants to know what it is that makes them stand out on this world.
~~~~
It wasn't Hanshin, with the kudan, but it was something similar. When they'd fallen into the world, their animal companions had arrived with them. These animals were them, but not them, separate personalities, somehow linked. Exactly how it all worked and what it all meant was beyond all of them, even Sayoran.
Sayoran's daemon, and the creatures were most insistent that that was what they were called, no matter what is sounded like to the travellers's ears, was a small cricket called Miu. It was lucky that one of their daemons was small, so that the daemon could hide and they could pretend Mokona was someone's daemon. They'd have a hard time explaining Mokona otherwise. They had a hard time explaining Mokona anyway, with a lot of people looking questioningly at Mokona, because whatever Mokona was, Mokona wasn't any sort of animal found in this world. Fai's daemon, Dimochka, was a medium-sized bird, grey plumage with a black-and-white head. When Dimochka flew, it was poetry in motion, but quite often, he was just as happy to land on the back of Kurogane's daemon and be carried everywhere.
Kurogane's daemon was large enough that he wouldn't have noticed the weight of his passenger. Lizard was a large, well, he was a lizard, with big, strong legs and a thoroughly vicious bite. The others had tried to tell Kurogane that Lizard's name couldn't be Lizard, that he had to have a real name, but both daemon and man turned round with the same look of aggravated disdain. Apparently, Lizard's name really could be Lizard.
It's probably just as well that Kurogane and Lizard are quite so similar, it would make it easier for Kurogane to fight alongside him. Not that there had been any cause for fighting yet, but Kurogane was always alert to the possibility.
Sayoran found the whole thing fascinating. Fai enjoyed watching him try to understand the local customs. The innkeeper's daughter, at that age where all anyone wanted was to be away from *here*, no matter where here was, and to be somewhere else, anywhere else, enjoyed telling Sayoran all about the daemons. Sayoran had learnt enough on their travels not to reveal straight away that they came from somewhere without these shadow-forms, instead gently easing the information from the girl with tales of "comparative folklore" and "ethnology" and other such things that Fai knew nothing of.
The innkeeper’s daughter explained how the animals were part of them, that their forms had some meaning, but not always an obvious one, and that the personalities of the daemons reflect their human halves. When they first arrived, Fai wondered if it was some hidden facet that the daemons embodied, trying not to think too hard about what the bird flying free might mean about him, but it was more complicated, more symbiotic than that. And obviously, their relationships to their daemons wouldn't be the same as someone born on this world, they hadn't grown up with them, grown up intertwined with a second voice, something Fai's missed out on twice.
The innkeeper's daughter's description of the daemons as reflections made more sense the longer they stayed here. Miu was so small she could go almost anywhere, insatiably curious like Sayoran, but without those cares that weighed him down. Lizard and Kurogane might both have pretended that each was an extension of the other, that there was no difference between them, that had Lizard named Kurogane he would have called him Human, but Lizard was that slight bit more relaxed than Kurogane, willing to let things go, willing to sleep in in the mornings in the way the ninja would never allow himself.
Fai knew they made an odd group, and heard the girl trying to explain that to Sayoran without saying any of the words she either doesn't know, shouldn't know or fears are hurtful. Despite the girl's attempts, Fai heard what people say about him, and the others. Thinking that Mokona is Sayoran's daemon, people said that of course Sayoran has a peculiar daemon, look at who he's travelling with. What's a boy like him doing travelling with men like that?
Fai wanted to ask how people knew, people normally made assumptions that he contributed to with the Puppy and Kitty thing, but that was under his control. He feared they may have been obvious through breaking some taboo without knowing it, and that would never do. Sayoran's gentle questioning of the innkeeper's daughter provided the answer to this also. It's the touching of daemons, both the touching of another's daemon or the touching of two daemons, it's a sign, at the very least of closeness. Apparently, even brothers didn't touch each other's daemons, while Dimochka did spend an awful lot of time resting on Lizard's shoulder for a bird who should have been in flight or on his human partner's shoulder if he wanted a rest. Fai could feel it when Dimochka landed on Lizard's shoulder, felt a thrill that ran right through him, and a similar sort of feeling when Kurogane looked mostly-mock daggers at him while feeding Dimochka bites of any seafood they had. "The damn bird doesn't even need to eat," Kurogane would say, his loud and angry words entirely undermined by how careful he was to not disturb Dimochka from whatever perch he'd found, even if that perch was Kurogane's shoulder. So yes, Fai could see why people know without them saying anything.
Fai wondered if they should stop, if he should stop, if he even could stop Dimochka doing whatever he pleased, because the daemons are not under their direct control, not like that. And it is Dimochka who makes the contact with Kurogane, with Lizard, not Fai.
Fai asked Dimochka his opinion, because he thinks that's only fair. Dimochka says he could stop, if Fai wanted, but he said it in such a way that Fai could tell he would, if Fai asked him to, but not because Dimochka himself wanted to stop. Fai didn't want to stop either. Kurogane, despite the bluster, seemed to enjoy contact. Not *just* like that, Kurogane was a very physical person, in a way Fai isn't, with people who aren't Kurogane, Sayoran or Sakura. Fai wondered if it was a ninja thing, all that training together, living together, fighting together. He wouldn't know, Kurogane was the only warrior he knew. Fai's also aware that he's the exact opposite, avoiding contact, even in crowded, busy places, bending with the flow of the crowd so no one quite touches him. After they were put in the tower, Ashura was the only person who touched him, and even that had been years later. The idea of making Dimochka live like that made Fai heartsick.
So he asked Kurogane what they should do. Of course Kurogane had noticed the looks they get, Kurogane notices things, but Kurogane also hadn't said anything about them. He tended not to, unless he thought what he said would make a difference.
"Why should we stop?"
Fai tried to explain that it will stop the looks they receive, but Kurogane's answer to that is "so what?" No, Kurogane had never hidden anything he is, except maybe that heart of his under anger, muscle and glare. He'd never changed what he is to suit someone else. It's one of those moments when Fai realised he knew nothing of Kurogane's Nihon, beyond their brief visits there, and Kurogane's past beyond what they found out in Rekort, because Fai hadn’t asked as part of some unspoken pact to let the past be. Maybe in Nihon they really don't care, or maybe, and Fai has a skinny boy's memories even though he had been under Ashura's protection, no one has ever bothered Kurogane about because Kurogane would have punched them into next week. Maybe Kurogane's never needed to hide anything.
Still, next time the group travelled out and around the town, and they received such a look, Kurogane was careful to turn to the man looking at them and ask if there was anything he wanted. The way Kurogane said it, there's threat and the promise of violence. He turned to the man in synchronisation with Lizard and for the first time Fai wondered whether Lizard has poison in his bite.
It didn’t stop the looks, but it did mean people are less obvious about it, which is all Fai could have hoped for.
They stay longer than expected on the world, Sayoran was searching for a book, and they were having to search every library they can find, because there are no collectors’ almanacs. The world is in that time, after the printing press but before the steam engine, so most books are in the libraries of nobles, and what's called a city is only a large town, but even so, public libraries are forming. They searched in patterns, one week here, one week there, but always returning to the inn they originally stayed in.
Sometimes the innkeeper's daughter came with them as a guide, and when she didn't, they try to bring her small gifts from the towns, the nearest she will get to visiting some of them.
The travelling meant that the looks and stares were back, the same expression in each new place.
One time it was worse than looks. Fai was tying the horses up in a stable when three men set up on him. He can guess why they're violent, and he can guess why they chose him to attack.
Obviously, they didn’t know that Fai wasn't anything like as defenceless as he looked.
Dimochka got his talons into them, as a look of horror spread on their faces. It is horror, not fear or pain, because Fai knew that on this world, after a child reaches eight or nine or so, daemons remained fixed. The yobs attacked a man and a tern. They faced a vampire and a vulture.
The fight was over quickly, long before Kurogane and Sayoran raced around the corner, having heard the unmistakable sound of violence and guessing that Fai might be involved. Dimochka had not changed back by the time they arrive, blood coated his talons, golden feathers out as he checked those for splashes of blood. Dimochka muttered to himself, hoping that when he changed back it would clean him automatically, otherwise he will need a bath.
Fai wasn’t sure what to expect, because Dimochka hadn't ever changed while the others have been in the room. Fai had always known the ability was there, he could feel the urge to shift running under both their skins when he fed from Kurogane, and maybe Kurogane and Lizard had seen Dimochka's feathers turn golden and beak sharpen out of the corner of their eyes and written it off as the effects of the feeding, but this was the first time Dimochka had completely changed.
Sayoran stopped running, made several sensible conclusions, filing the knowledge away as data about how daemons work, but other than that he behaved completely normally, saying hello to Dimochka and helping to tie the villains up. There will be a local sheriff, a town this size is bound to have one. Even if he disapproves of the travellers, he will probably have enough sense of justice to lock the men up. Their group will say Kurogane did all the damage to the men, and would stick to that story even if the men disagreed. It was for the best, and, after all, who'd believe Fai and little Dimochka could do that?
Kurogane picked up a few of the feather that Dimochka left scattered around. Fai was scared to look at Kurogane, scared that this will be a secret too far, but when Kurogane looked at him it was with awe and wonder, not horror and revulsion. Lizard looked less impressed but that's probably more because Dimochka in this form is too heavy to carry easily and has just landed on Lizard’s right shoulder. Lizard is like Kurogane and won't admit it so he didn't say anything when Dimochka landed on him, because Dimochka is like Fai and enjoys teasing Lizard.
Several worlds later, Kurogane made Fai a gift of those feathers, set in a necklace, but that was in the future. Now, they had almost two months more on this world before Sayoran even found the book he'd been looking for, never mind finished reading it. But Sayoran does finish it eventually, and the second book it points to. Combined, the books tell him more than they knew before, nothing practical yet, but theoretically, if they found the right conditions, they could reanimate the clones without it killing anyone else. The second book even made some suggestions about what those conditions were, and how they might test if a world has them. After so long of only finding what Kurogane called "half-assed suggestions", it was more than they could have hoped for.
It means they have to leave, to go looking for the sort of world the books provide directions towards. They tested this world; it doesn't fit the criteria so they'll have to move on.
Fai was ambivalent. This world had its advantages yes, but he wasn’t sure he wanted those two children who they had travelled with for so long to live on world where people are attacked just for being different. And the looks, the looks might have been worse than the violence. Even before he became a vampire, Fai thinks he could have handled the violence better than the looks. Then again, as Kurogane would say "every world has idiots", and this world was, idiots aside, pleasant and peaceful. And it had their daemons. Once they left, Fai would be, well alone wasn't the right word, because Sayoran, Sakura and Kurogane would all do their best to make sure he was never alone again, but it wouldn't be the same as him and Dimochka, which itself wasn't the same as what he'd had once before, but it was as close as he'd ever get. They would be leaving that behind.
But it must be done. They promised Sakura they would travel with Sayoran, they promised the kid that he'd never have to travel alone. Fai couldn't make a liar out of Kurogane for his own desires.
Mokona turned away when they start to leave, eyes closed because Mokona understood that this was a private moment between each traveller and their daemon. Fai could feel the separation start, a feeling of distance, pulling apart somewhere deep inside. He had no idea what to say, but he knew he had to say something to Dimochka, want to say something, because even if Fai would be the only person who knew, goodbyes mattered.
"I ... Thank you. Thank you for this time we have spent together. I will miss you."
"Miss me? I'm not going anywhere." Fai felt Dimochka's smile as much as he saw it. "I've always been here, and I'll always be there with you. Look at the wide-open sky, and you'll find me."
Fai carried that with him in his heart, through the other worlds they visit, searching for one with all the right qualities. He made sure to take the time to look up to the horizon, especially when it all got too much, which it did sometimes, and he felt it - the feeling of flight, the sense of air under his wings - both things he could never have experienced and yet he has.
He kept Dimochka there in his heart, because Dimochka was right, he'll always be there.
~~~~
End notes: I didn't want to write this as "character has always had a daemon", because I think that would change the character so much and how their society does things. The best Daemon fusion fics take that into account (brief pause here to rec Andraste's Dr. Who daemon fusion fic), and someone else could probably do really interesting thing with the prompt taken that way, but I wanted to look at it from the direction of what would the characters notice as the major difference.
Which meant I had to use characters who could world/reality hop.
Once I'd decided that, the TRC crowd sprang to mind.
Lizard was the first daemon I decided on. I got a flash of Kurogane and a lizard, big squat shoulders and all, moving in sync, and that was that. Lizard, as you might have guessed, is a Komodo dragon.
I knew Syoran's daemon had to be small, and a cricket was a clear choice after that. Her name is Miu which means feather, because I like to keep the theme from the manga.
Fai's daemon was always going to be a bird. I was desperately looking for a very feathery bird that could flap. Looking through Russian birds, because Fai's speech bubbles are filled with Cyrillic when Mokona isn't present, I found the Aleutian tern (which is what Dimochka is most of the time) and thought, "yeah, that's it," then I saw a picture of a Himalayan vulture and went, "oh!" So yes, you won't like Dimochka when he gets angry, and that helped set up some of what plot there is.
