Weird dream channel — The Japanese Navy
Apr. 27th, 2026 11:31 amI'm still here. The antiseizure medicine crosstaper has been wreaking havoc on my energy levels, so I haven't been able to do as much as anything as I would like, which including posting and reading here, but the dream I had last night was so strange I wanted to be sure to tell you all about it:
I dreamed I had enlisted in the Japanese Navy. I was going to be serving on a submarine. I was going to be. . . *drumroll please*. . . a cake decorator!
Unfortunately, I woke up before I got to see how myself in action, but I'd like to take a moment to thank my recruiting officer, Bonnie, for believing in me and convincing me to sign up.
Also, oddly, in my dream the Japanese Navy didn't have boot camp or anything like it. You signed the forms with your recruiting officer, you walked down the hall to a place that looked like a cafeteria, where you were handed a paper bag containing your uniforms and sundries, and then you walked through a door and down a ramp onto the ship. Apparently everything after that was on-the-job training.
For All Mankind 5.06 and The Testaments 1.05
Apr. 27th, 2026 04:26 pmFor All Mankind 5.06:
( Spoilers think Mars is theirs… )
The Testaments 1.05:
( Spoilers consider a Prom in Gilead to be incredibly creepy and aesthetic at hte same time… )
(no subject)
Apr. 23rd, 2026 04:57 pmI really wanted to grow blackberries. They have some weird pattern of growing berries on the second year growth. I've tried to understand it by watching YT. Anyway, I cut a lot of it down previously and I think there were going to be flowers this year, then berries. Now nothing. But you can't kill blackberries, not without a nuclear option. So that plant will rise again. With its wicked, wicked thorns. You want berries, well berries cost. And right here is where you start paying…
Search maintenance
Apr. 22nd, 2026 09:19 amHappy Wednesday!
I'm taking search offline sometime today to upgrade the server to a new instance type. It should be down for a day or so -- sorry for the inconvenience. If you're curious, the existing search machine is over 10 years old and was starting to accumulate a decade of cruft...!
Also, apparently these older machines cost more than twice what the newer ones cost, on top of being slower. Trying to save a bit of maintenance and cost, and hopefully a Wednesday is okay!
Edited: The other cool thing is that this also means that the search index will be effectively realtime afterwards... no more waiting a few minutes for the indexer to catch new content.
The Four Emperors (Book Series)
Apr. 20th, 2026 10:58 amThe individual novels are: "Palatine" (Nero dies mid book already, because the rise and fall providing the red thread of the novel isn't his but of one of the two Praetorian Prefects, Nymphidius Sabinus, who is instrumental in Nero's downfall but then gets ideas before the agreed upon successor, Galba, even has arrived in Rome), "Galba's Men" (Galba finally shows up in Rome; it doesn't end well for him), "Otoh's Regret" (Otho finds out what being Emperor really means) and "Vitellius' Feast" (Vitellius manages to make Nero look good postumously). And while the Emperors on question do get narrative space - I think Otho gets the most, because he's already an important character in "Galba's Men" - , none of them is ever the main character - their rise and fall just provides the outward plot, while what the novels are really about is how this effects our main cast who occupies all variations between "just tries to survive this insanity"' and "is very ambitious themselves" , with "can't stand seeing things done incompetently" and "actually starts to believe it's important who is Emperor'" are featuring as motivations.
This bunch of main characters we follow through all the novels are: Epaphroditos (Nero's wily private secretary, freedman, started out as a boy slave in the Julian-Claudian household in the reign of Tiberius), Philo (Epaphroditos' assistant - "the private secretary's secretary" - , very competent and sweet natured, too sweet natured, in fact, for his own good), Artemina ("Mina", quick-tempered, starting out as a towel holder for Nero's Empress but determined to do very much more), Sporus (eunuch, Nero's favourite), Lysander (announcer) and Felix (head of slave placements and overseers), Teretia (daughter of Philo's landlady, in love with ihm) . There are others, female and male alike, who don't make it through all four novels or are introduced not in the first one but later, like Caenis, a freedwoman of the Imperial Household (and thus everyone's old acquaintance) showing up in "Otho's Regret" with very much an agenda of her own (and I have to say this is my favourite fictional depiction of Caenis yet, including Lindsay Davis' novel about her, which alas I felt was a bit of a let down mid novel onwards), or the moody teenager who is the younger son of Caenis' lover, one Domitian. (
There is a lot of black humour in these books, and yet - or perhaps even because of that - the actual tragedies hit very hard. (I was reminded of the tv adaption of I, Claudius in this regard.) And for 99% of the characters three dimensional characterisations. (Including the Emperors. The only one who is just 100% awful is Vitellius.) The narrative premise that the palace staff is the one who actually keeps the Empire going irrespective of who happens to be Emperor also reminds me of British tv, though in this case Yes, Minister, but of course there is no slavery in 20th century Britain. And since most of the main cast are either former slaves or currently slaves, I was curious ahead of reading the books of how the author would treat the subject. For starters: not via the Spartacus approach (i.e. focusing on slaves fighting for their freedom). None of the characters think slavery per se is wrong; the freedmen (and -women) have slaves themselves. (This is historically accurate but quite often doesn't make it into fictional depictions.) There is also, early on, a lot of emotional identification with their masters' causes. At the same time, the narrative, I think, succeeds in making it clear that being a slave, even if your owner is the "considerate" type actually bothering to use your name instead of "boy" or "girl" , is to be in constant non stop danger of life and limb, simply because there is no legal protection whatsoever, and even if your current owner doesn't see themselves as entitled to have sex with you or beat you, the next one might, and/or any misfortune they suffer could lead to your own (painful) death. For all the banter and black humor, this undercurrent is there.
(I also thought the relationships between classes and free/unfree worked for me. For example, ( Epaphroditos and Nero. )
Nitpicks: the first two novels feature one of my pet peeves, to wit, characters using the expression "okay", even in initialized form (i.e. "ok"). I'm not a linguistic purist when it comes to historical novels, but that's one of the exceptions. So I was really glad novels 3 and 4 no longer had this.
Trigger warnings: did I mention the main characters are either former or present slaves in a society where the idea of consent for anyone not a freeborn Roman man is non existent? I will say that explicit scenes in the sense that we get detailed descriptions are rare, not because they don't happen but because the author usually works via implication and/or showing the aftermath.
State of the history: While Suetonius and Tacitus are clearly the main sources here, I would say the novels take the current state of historical research into account. I.e. Nero may be loathed by the Senate and increasingly by the higher ranking military, but he's wildly popular with the masses (and not responsible for the Great Fire of Rome), Domitian does not spend his spare time as a moody teen killing flies to signal the future. The big twist of Otho's life - ( which is spoilery ) is build up to through two novels. I wll say that in addition to the above mentioned "OK" in the first two novels, I am thrown by some of the very Anglophone shortening of names (hence Mina, or Alex for Alexander), but the slave names themselves, where invented, strike me as plausible (mostly Greek, which is what the Romans liked to do), and the various celebrations of Roman festivals, not just the well known ones like the Saturnalia, to mark the year are a good way to get some exposition about Roman every day life across. Notably NOT catering for what's popular is the fact that is no gladiator among either the main or the supporting cast. I found that ever so refreshing.
In conclusion: an enjoyable series of novels set during a truly outrageously bizarre year of Roman history.
The Testaments 1.04 and For All Mankind 5.04
Apr. 19th, 2026 03:21 pmFor All Mankind 5.04: In which we get introduced to a new cast member and learn an old acquaintance is on their way. Also: (some) answers about the latest dastardly scheme.
( Spoilers wait with their reveals until after mission launch )
(no subject)
Apr. 15th, 2026 05:23 pmI bought a couple of tomato plants. Too early, like last year, but the danger of frost is over and I didn't want to wait till everything is picked over. I kind of stupidly want blueberry plants.
My space key is getting stuck at random and it's annoying.
Poetry.
The Heavy Bear Who Goes With Me
By Delmore Schwartz
“the withness of the body”
The heavy bear who goes with me,
A manifold honey to smear his face,
Clumsy and lumbering here and there,
The central ton of every place,
The hungry beating brutish one
In love with candy, anger, and sleep,
Crazy factotum, dishevelling all,
Climbs the building, kicks the football,
Boxes his brother in the hate-ridden city.
Breathing at my side, that heavy animal,
That heavy bear who sleeps with me,
Howls in his sleep for a world of sugar,
A sweetness intimate as the water’s clasp,
Howls in his sleep because the tight-rope
Trembles and shows the darkness beneath.
—The strutting show-off is terrified,
Dressed in his dress-suit, bulging his pants,
Trembles to think that his quivering meat
Must finally wince to nothing at all.
That inescapable animal walks with me,
Has followed me since the black womb held,
Moves where I move, distorting my gesture,
A caricature, a swollen shadow,
A stupid clown of the spirit’s motive,
Perplexes and affronts with his own darkness,
The secret life of belly and bone,
Opaque, too near, my private, yet unknown,
Stretches to embrace the very dear
With whom I would walk without him near,
Touches her grossly, although a word
Would bare my heart and make me clear,
Stumbles, flounders, and strives to be fed
Dragging me with him in his mouthing care,
Amid the hundred million of his kind,
The scrimmage of appetite everywhere.
Music Monday - Two Gallants
Despite What You've Been Told