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redfiona99Title: And yet they say you shouldn't meet your heroes
Fandom: Torchwood and Captain America
Characters: Jack Harkness, Steve Rogers, background Howling Commandos
Ratings/Warnings/etc: PG-12 rated angsty gen. Warnings for Jack's canonical attitude to lethal injuries, temporary character death, mentions of off-screen character death, canonical levels of violence. Further more specific warnings are available.
Notes: When I started writing this, only one of the characters had time travelled. We are after Station 5 but before Torchwood series 1 for Jack Harkness and we are after serum, before being frozen for Cap.
Summary: Here was Steve Rogers, in 1944, thinking all the worst had already happened to him, when it hadn't even begun to happen, and there was nothing Jack could do to stop it.
~~~~
There'd been some question about what to do with Jack while the war was on. Obviously, he couldn't go anywhere near London, and Torchwood Three seemed to be determined that he wasn't going to be in Cardiff. (Later he finds out why. Much later, he finds out who sent the order back in time and how they did it.)
To keep him away, Jack was sent on artefact hunts in Occupied Europe. Major Cadogan sent him off with a cheerful "we'll see you back eventually," while George added a decidedly unhelpful, "it's not like you'll come to permanent harm." The Major was alright, but George, George was unpleasant. The Major assured Jack that George had been a good kid, but there was precious little evidence left in the man. Whatever had happened, the Major blamed himself and kept George around because of it. Jack couldn't understand that at the time, but later he did, like a punch to the gut, and when he'd been asked to explain he said the same thing as the Major, almost word for word, not deliberately but because it was the only way he could even come close to making himself understood.
Blending in with the regular Armed Forces had been easier before the US officially joined the war; as long as there weren't any Canadians about, Jack claimed to be from there, it wasn't like people could tell the difference, and if there were Canadians, he said he was an American who'd joined the Commonwealth forces because he thought it was a just cause. No-one really questioned him further, and he came in, got artefacts and left. Very simple, very straightforward.
When America joined up, it became more complicated, because Jack couldn't make up a simple lie about somewhere, Idaho, because there was always an off-chance that there would be someone from near wherever, Idaho who'd know too much about the town in question and smell a rat. The wrong rat, but still. Jack became very good at guessing where the men in units came from, so he wouldn't find himself captured as a possible German spy.
Jack was heading up through Italy into German territory for his latest mission, hitching on the back of whatever actual military operations were going on, and, as luck would have it, most of the units were American, which okay, meant he blended in better, but on the other hand, meant he had to be careful with his claims. Jack was considering pretending to be Canadian, thinking it might be the safer option here and now, when he saw *him*; Steve Rogers, Captain America, in the middle of the mass of troops.
Time Agents don't have time for heroes. They know everyone has feet of clay, mostly because they've were the ones who put the clay there in the first place. Seeing history first hand, being part of it, it knocks the hero-worship right out of you. But even the most cynical Time Agent still held Steve Rogers up as a hero.
Years of Time Agency work, and his time since, had taught Jack that it was important not to meet your heroes, they always let you down, but this feeling wasn't that. He's Captain Jack Harkness, he's got nothing to be afraid of, because, as George had put it, it's not like he'll come to permanent harm, and yet, he's scared of meeting this single human being because he doesn't want Steve Rogers, *the* Steve Rogers, thinking ill of him.
Jack put his feelings to one side, there was a mission to complete, and he had to do it. He joined the troops heading north, but hung back, stuck to the edge of conversations, toned it all down. It was probably the most incognito he'd ever been.
As they got closer to Jack's objective, he made sure he got himself assigned into the advanced scouting group so he could get closer to his goal before breaking off on to his own mission - he might as well have the extra protection of being in a group while he could have it. He didn't know that Captain Rogers and the rest of the Howling Commandos are assigned there too. He finds out soon enough afterwards, though, and he supposed he should have guessed that's what the army would do with them.
It wasn’t too bad, Jack's not the only man not from the 107th in the group so there's no reason he'd attract that much extra attention, but it's a much smaller group of people. It makes hiding in the crowd harder. Steve Rogers being Steve Rogers made it impossible.
He must have noticed Jack hanging at the back and thought it was shyness or fear of ridicule or something like that, because he made sure to come over, to include Jack in discussions, and Jack can't help it. He has this terrible habit of falling in with heroes and, like Stebbins the tailor said about the worsted wool of Jack's coat, Captain Rogers had the quality.
Moth to the flame, Jack is attracted to him. He means that in all the ways. He does nothing about it because he knows it will make Captain Rogers uncomfortable. He knows this because every Time Agent knows everything about Steve Rogers, almost as though it was part of the training manual even though it isn’t unless you’re going to be sent to 20th Century Earth, but knowing it doesn't come close to what it's like to meet him, nothing in the records does.
Jack gets to spend two weeks in the company of Captain America and the Howling Commandos, slogging through mud and slushy snow. He gets to meet *the* Bucky Barnes, after the first terrible thing that happens to him but before the second; Jack tells him a joke that's so filthy Barnes is still sniggering about it five minutes later. A couple of the others ask Barnes what's so funny, and when he explains they react with horror, amusement or horrified amusement. Jack thinks he likes Jones's reaction the best, scrunched up face and "I am *not* translating that for Dernier." Major Falsworth went all flustered and pink, and muttered something about it being for the best that Agent Carter was not present.
Meeting Dame Peggy, even if it was before she was a Dame, it would have been an honour and a pleasure, and also too dangerous. She was the one person associated with this mission Jack might meet in the future, and she'd have seen right through any excuse that no, he just looked a lot like his father.
That's the moment where it hits him, that there's no one he can talk to about *this*. He can debrief about the mission, but there's no one he can share the glee of meeting his heroes with. They're not heroes to Earth, yet, and anyone who'd appreciate what it means to Jack hasn't been born yet, or is dead. Or hasn't been born yet and is dead. Something about that is particularly depressing to him in the moment.
Captain Rogers must notice something's wrong with him, but he doesn't say anything at the time, he waited until they shared a watch before checking that Jack was okay. "Is everything alright?" Rogers knew that Jack was a Captain without a unit. There weren't many ways that could happen, and none of them were good.
"My squad was a lot bigger before the war," was Jack's reply. Which was true, even if Jack didn't mean this war.
Rogers lets him be silent, but offers a comforting hand on the shoulders. It's exactly what Jack needs at that moment. *This* man they'd follow into the gates of Hell.
They were getting close to Jack's target, and he was having to think of ways of breaking off from the others, collecting the artefact, and joining back up without being spotted.
They were also getting close to the 107th's real target - Jack's going to feel like a real heel when he has to report to Torchwood that the Howling Commandos have targets different to the rest of the army. He'd known it anyway, from the reports they read at the Academy, but there'd always been plausible deniability, Torchwood hadn't known he'd known. Now there was no getting away from it. The trick was going to be telling them in such a way as to keep Torchwood away from Hydra so Hydra wouldn't attempt to infiltrate them once they knew about Torchwood. He's got to do it without polluting the timeline, or possibly it was already polluted, and he needed to pollute it in exactly the same way. Changing the past is a known problem with time travel, is more than half its purpose sometimes, but that doesn't stop it being a real headache thinking about it all.
Jack was still thinking of ways when Jones radioed back to base for backup. Even with all the advantages on their side, the fortress which turned out to be the Howling Commandos's target is too heavily fortified for them to attack with such small numbers.
It was a change that worked in Jack's favour. Once there are more people around, it'll be easier for him to sneak away. The problem was that while they waited for the backup to arrive, a patrol from castle found them. The firefight is unavoidable, but isn't the main problem. They’ll probably win, but someone is going to notice that the patrol hasn't come back and that's going to alert the castle garrison. That backup had better come soon.
Jack almost doesn't see the bullet that kills him. He was busy avoiding being shot by the two soldiers behind the snowdrift, and he sees their friend late, out of the corner of his eye. The enemy’s rock-grey uniforms really do work well as camouflage up here. Jack's not the soldier’s target, Rogers is, but Jack moved to get in the way of the bullet, because even with the superpowers Jack knew Rogers had, there’s no way Rogers would be able to deflect that bullet in time.
Jack's lungs are already feeling heavy by the time Rogers comes back from finishing off the third soldier. He says something about his shield, something that Jack can't hear. Jack can hear the guilt though, and tries to reassure him. "It'll be alright. Don't worry, it'll be alright." And yes, he's dying, but Jack thinks he can sound reasonably convincing about this.
~~~~
Jack came to covered by a body bag. He didn’t feel the press of earth above him so he was going to assume they haven't buried him yet. That was a plus, because even with the explosive he carried in his person for those occasions, using an explosion to exhume yourself always creates other problems while solving the first one. Jack checked his pockets for the laser-knife he carries for these occasions and finding it, lights it. It cut through the cotton bodybag-cum-shroud easily enough, and when he looked up through the eyehole he created, he could see the roof of a military ambulance. He's got fun reasons as well as bad reasons for being able to recognise the vehicle so quickly. It was a good old Dodge WC54, so he even knew whose army had picked up his body.
The ambulance was silent, and not moving. He couldn’t hear anyone else so he risked cutting himself all the way out of the bag. It turns out he wasn’t alone, but he was the only one breathing. Looking through the window, Jack could see the organised chaos that was the medical set up just behind the front lines of any battle. If he moved with enough conviction, no one would notice him. The door latch was easy enough to open, and he was out, another soldier again.
He tried to orient himself to when and where he was. Judging by the landscape, he was maybe five, six clicks back from where he died, and the fact that he's in an ambulance-cum-mortuary van told him that the backup did arrive. It means he doesn't need to feel any guilt about going off to complete his mission for Torchwood and leaving the Howling Commandos to take the castle.
Jack found the artefact easily enough, things that emit blue that's horribly reminiscent of Cherenkov radiation tend to be easy to spot. Luckily, it's a bit of Verenovi tech and he's handled enough of their stuff to know how to turn it off. It leaves him with a thing that looks like a rock, about a foot long and half a foot wide, to carry around, but at least it's not glowing anymore so he can hide it the rucksack he 'acquired' from the ambulance.
There were lots of ways he could go to get to Civitavecchia, to hand the artefact over to be delivered back to Torchwood HQ. None of them involve heading back towards the castle, but that was still the route Jack took. He tells himself it's because he knows the path will have been cleared by the fighting, that it means no one can sneak up on him. He tells himself this is the way that the artefact is least likely to end up in unready hands. It wasn’t that it was dangerous, Jack was nine and a half tenths certain it's the Verenovi equivalent of an MP3 player, but they don't have those yet on Earth so Torchwood probably is the best place for it.
Jack picked up a rifle from an over-run artillery point and defends the 107th from a distance. He sniped the soldier coming at Morita, and tells himself that it's because Morita still owes him from that last poker game, not that he'll ever be able to collect. Jack remembers his history, Jim Morita doesn't die today, all he's really doing is making sure history continues. Jack's not sure what's worse, the idea of changing history, not that he wouldn't if the other option was Jim dying, or the idea that this, everything, the Chula war ship, the Doctor and Satellite Five, were always going to happen because they always had happened.
He left for Civitavecchia once it was clear that there was no more resistance left at the castle.
~~~~
For the next spell, Jack’s job was tidying up after Allied advances. There's no good reason why North Italy and the Tyrol have so many alien artefacts - there's lots of theories, but no provable reason - but he's kept busy making sure they don't end up with anyone but Torchwood. So busy that he's distracted, worried about how to get this latest bit of tech because all the ways he's thought of so far are painful, and maybe he shouldn't have been flirting with that ambulance driver (she had the most amazing hazel eyes, he couldn't not), but either which way, he doesn't notice the Howling Commandos enter the canteen, not until he hears Duggan singing, which of course he noticed, it could wake the dead.
He made the sharpest exit he can. And he thought he was home and clear, just having to mark this down as an unfortunate occurrence and needing to change his plan of attack for getting to the latest artefact because he had to leave the area while the Commandos were there, when he walks into Captain Rogers at the backdoor of the Mess. Literally into him, because there are cannons smaller than Steve Rogers.
Rogers didn’t give him a chance to run, grabbing him by the wrists, "you died in my arms."
"Bring me a coffee and I'll explain." Truth isn't Jack's tactic of choice, and he was ashamed to say that he only decided that he was going to tell Captain Rogers some of it after ruling out all his other options. He can't cut and run, Rogers would put out an alarm which would draw far too much attention to Jack, and therefore possibly to Torchwood. He can't take Rogers in a fight - yes, he can't die but Jack'd lose every single fight even if they fought a hundred times. He can't retcon him, because goodness knew how the drug would interact with Super Soldier physiology; when it having no effect was the best outcome, it wasn't a valid strategy. That left truth.
Jack could tell that Rogers didn't want to leave him out here unguarded, but that much vaunted willingness to believe the best in people won out and Rogers went inside, returning with two coffees, or what the army calls coffees. Jack walked over to the nearest table. It was bitterly cold outside, so there's no one else stupid enough to be sitting at the outdoor tables, which gave them some privacy.
"You died in my arms," was how Rogers started the conversation again, Jack could understand why.
Jack had decided on which parts of the truth he was going to tell Rogers. He isn't going to say, 'I will be born three thousand years from now on a planet orbiting a star that's so far away that you can't even see its light from Earth, and that's the least interesting thing about me.' He knew that Rogers doesn't know about aliens yet and wouldn’t accept that as the truth. And isn't that the thing, here was Steve Rogers, early 1944, thinking all the worst had already happened to him, when it hadn't even begun to happen, and there was nothing Jack could do to stop it, and no warning he could give him, because there's no way Rogers would believe him.
"My name is Jack Harkness, and I am a Captain. If you call up US Command and get them to check with Allied Command, everything will check out. What they won't tell you is that following some scientific experimentation they never bothered to explain to me properly, I don't stay dead." It was close enough to Rogers's own story that he'd want to believe it. "If you want, you can shoot me to prove it, but I've always found that such a noisy method, especially given the present location. You can stab me in the heart, force the knife you're carrying straight through my ribcage, it'll hurt like hell, but a few hours later, I'm back and right as rain."
"And we've not heard about this how?"
"If the US developed the technology to create undying soldiers, do you think it would tell the world?" Rogers nodded, it was a fair enough point, the super soldier sitting in front of Jack not having mentioned his own quirks in any of this. "They got it to work once. Every attempt since kills people. Doesn't seem to stop them trying though." Jack thought he got the tone right, that snapping anger, barely concealed behind morbid good humour. He doesn't say he watched holovideos of Captain Rogers growing up, wanting to be him, and that he's sure he learned the tone from him.
Jack can see the questions Captain Rogers was thinking of, questions Jack can't answer because Jack has no idea what it felt like for other people or if there's anything after, he doesn’t stay dead long enough to find out. He has become vividly aware that his experiences aren't everyone's. Starting with waking up shocked on Satellite Five, the only one there left alive, he hadn't known how he'd survived, maybe luck was a lady after all. The next time, he wrote off as luck again, the third time, he couldn't. Simple poison isn't on his top five worst ways to die anymore, but that time, it raced right to the top.
If he had a limited number of revivals he'd used up more of them then than even the Torchwood ladies had when he'd fallen through the Rift and into Victorian Cardiff.
"What it feels like" is the easiest question to answer and that’s impossible too.
But Rogers doesn’t ask any of those questions. Something soft comes over Rogers's face instead, soft and melancholy. "You'll get out of this. No matter what else happens, you will get out of this alive."
Jack's got no reason to think he'll die, true, but Rogers doesn't know about aliens, and their artefacts, that might leave Jack in a state no-one would call alive, even if he wasn't dead. "Call it a good chance that I will."
"If I give you a letter, can you make sure that Agent Carter gets it? If it's necessary." Jack knows what the necessity Rogers can't bring himself to speak of is. Jack can't promise that he'll get the letter to Agent Carter, because who knows what'll happen between, he wants to get it to her so much because it’s Captain Rogers asking, but he won't let himself let Steve Rogers down with a promise he can’t keep.
"I'll do everything I can." Rogers nodded, he understood what Jack was promising. He's not saying he will do it, but the only reason the letter won't reach Agent Carter is if Jack's dead or so incapacitated he can't give it to someone else to pass on. He'll guard it like he guards his dog tags and his boots.
Rogers went back into the canteen, asking Jack to stay where he was with nothing more than a hand action. Jack felt the rush of warmth as the door open, and the sound of the people inside happily chattering away. It makes the ice-blue cold out there feel worse. Jack was pondering the likelihood of hypothermia, and exactly how warm the ambulance driver would feel against him, even though almost nothing on Earth would get him to leave where he's been put, when Rogers came back with some paper and a refill for the coffee.
Rogers writes quickly but neatly, even while Jack tries not to read what he's writing.
If ever there were a time to tell Rogers what was about to happen it was now. Jack wanted to, wants to warn him, but he can't, because years ago from now he swore an oath. The Time Agency for all its lies, flaws and hypocrisy, had been set up to stop meddling with the past by people from a future with time travel, no matter how well meant the interference was. There were probably some people in history where you could tell them exactly what would happen and no matter what their choices, it wouldn't interfere with the shape of history. Too many of the horrible things that were going to happen to Steve Rogers were tied up with the fate of the planet to risk telling him anything. All the things that either of them had ever believed in stopped Jack.
When Steve handed him the letter, it felt thick inside its envelope. "I'd say come inside but ..." Rogers trailed off.
"Don't worry. It's sort of an occupational hazard. I worry that one day I'm going to have to pretend to be my twin brother to be able to go anywhere."
Jack turned and walked away, he didn't look back, he didn't even try to find the tent he thought the nurse was staying in. Best to leave the camp entirely and avoid detection.
The letter weighed heavily on his conscience, leaving Jack constantly checking that he still had it, that it hadn’t fallen out of his coat. He checked at least once every day. He knew exactly how long it would be before he would have to come up with a plan of getting it to Agent Carter. He used the time to figure out a way of doing it without being detected. He settled for hiding in plain sight - right then, no one was going to notice another man in uniform coming into or out of headquarters. The tricky thing, it turned out, was being in London at the same time as Agent Carter, without Torchwood One or George finding out.
The letter was intact when it arrived on Agent Carter’s desk, neatly stamped FYEO. However tempted Jack might have been, he didn't tamper with the gum seal. Given all the things he's done, it was ridiculous that this is where he drew a line but it was the fact that it was personal, and that the weight of the world doesn't depend on it that stops him, this will stay between Steve and Peggy. Jack had no idea if this is one of the letters that survives and makes it into the history books he read; even if he's left his fingerprints on it, the Time Agency have placed worms in systems throughout history that will mean no link will ever been made between him and it. Jack likes the idea of that, some piece of history untouched by Torchwood, or the Time Agency or any of the other things that distort people into heroes and villains. Jack has been lucky enough to meet Steve Rogers and he’s better than that.
End notes: The original prompt, suggested by someone, goodness knows who, was "Captain America/Captain Jack because Steve really is Jack's type", and precisely because of that, it morphed into Cap + Jack, because of that, because let's be honest Jack/cheerful self-loathing is always his main pairing.
After this (what counts for me) spate of fics, I suspect the next one will be some time coming, since everything I'm working on is long or complicate or long *and* complicated.
Fandom: Torchwood and Captain America
Characters: Jack Harkness, Steve Rogers, background Howling Commandos
Ratings/Warnings/etc: PG-12 rated angsty gen. Warnings for Jack's canonical attitude to lethal injuries, temporary character death, mentions of off-screen character death, canonical levels of violence. Further more specific warnings are available.
Notes: When I started writing this, only one of the characters had time travelled. We are after Station 5 but before Torchwood series 1 for Jack Harkness and we are after serum, before being frozen for Cap.
Summary: Here was Steve Rogers, in 1944, thinking all the worst had already happened to him, when it hadn't even begun to happen, and there was nothing Jack could do to stop it.
~~~~
There'd been some question about what to do with Jack while the war was on. Obviously, he couldn't go anywhere near London, and Torchwood Three seemed to be determined that he wasn't going to be in Cardiff. (Later he finds out why. Much later, he finds out who sent the order back in time and how they did it.)
To keep him away, Jack was sent on artefact hunts in Occupied Europe. Major Cadogan sent him off with a cheerful "we'll see you back eventually," while George added a decidedly unhelpful, "it's not like you'll come to permanent harm." The Major was alright, but George, George was unpleasant. The Major assured Jack that George had been a good kid, but there was precious little evidence left in the man. Whatever had happened, the Major blamed himself and kept George around because of it. Jack couldn't understand that at the time, but later he did, like a punch to the gut, and when he'd been asked to explain he said the same thing as the Major, almost word for word, not deliberately but because it was the only way he could even come close to making himself understood.
Blending in with the regular Armed Forces had been easier before the US officially joined the war; as long as there weren't any Canadians about, Jack claimed to be from there, it wasn't like people could tell the difference, and if there were Canadians, he said he was an American who'd joined the Commonwealth forces because he thought it was a just cause. No-one really questioned him further, and he came in, got artefacts and left. Very simple, very straightforward.
When America joined up, it became more complicated, because Jack couldn't make up a simple lie about somewhere, Idaho, because there was always an off-chance that there would be someone from near wherever, Idaho who'd know too much about the town in question and smell a rat. The wrong rat, but still. Jack became very good at guessing where the men in units came from, so he wouldn't find himself captured as a possible German spy.
Jack was heading up through Italy into German territory for his latest mission, hitching on the back of whatever actual military operations were going on, and, as luck would have it, most of the units were American, which okay, meant he blended in better, but on the other hand, meant he had to be careful with his claims. Jack was considering pretending to be Canadian, thinking it might be the safer option here and now, when he saw *him*; Steve Rogers, Captain America, in the middle of the mass of troops.
Time Agents don't have time for heroes. They know everyone has feet of clay, mostly because they've were the ones who put the clay there in the first place. Seeing history first hand, being part of it, it knocks the hero-worship right out of you. But even the most cynical Time Agent still held Steve Rogers up as a hero.
Years of Time Agency work, and his time since, had taught Jack that it was important not to meet your heroes, they always let you down, but this feeling wasn't that. He's Captain Jack Harkness, he's got nothing to be afraid of, because, as George had put it, it's not like he'll come to permanent harm, and yet, he's scared of meeting this single human being because he doesn't want Steve Rogers, *the* Steve Rogers, thinking ill of him.
Jack put his feelings to one side, there was a mission to complete, and he had to do it. He joined the troops heading north, but hung back, stuck to the edge of conversations, toned it all down. It was probably the most incognito he'd ever been.
As they got closer to Jack's objective, he made sure he got himself assigned into the advanced scouting group so he could get closer to his goal before breaking off on to his own mission - he might as well have the extra protection of being in a group while he could have it. He didn't know that Captain Rogers and the rest of the Howling Commandos are assigned there too. He finds out soon enough afterwards, though, and he supposed he should have guessed that's what the army would do with them.
It wasn’t too bad, Jack's not the only man not from the 107th in the group so there's no reason he'd attract that much extra attention, but it's a much smaller group of people. It makes hiding in the crowd harder. Steve Rogers being Steve Rogers made it impossible.
He must have noticed Jack hanging at the back and thought it was shyness or fear of ridicule or something like that, because he made sure to come over, to include Jack in discussions, and Jack can't help it. He has this terrible habit of falling in with heroes and, like Stebbins the tailor said about the worsted wool of Jack's coat, Captain Rogers had the quality.
Moth to the flame, Jack is attracted to him. He means that in all the ways. He does nothing about it because he knows it will make Captain Rogers uncomfortable. He knows this because every Time Agent knows everything about Steve Rogers, almost as though it was part of the training manual even though it isn’t unless you’re going to be sent to 20th Century Earth, but knowing it doesn't come close to what it's like to meet him, nothing in the records does.
Jack gets to spend two weeks in the company of Captain America and the Howling Commandos, slogging through mud and slushy snow. He gets to meet *the* Bucky Barnes, after the first terrible thing that happens to him but before the second; Jack tells him a joke that's so filthy Barnes is still sniggering about it five minutes later. A couple of the others ask Barnes what's so funny, and when he explains they react with horror, amusement or horrified amusement. Jack thinks he likes Jones's reaction the best, scrunched up face and "I am *not* translating that for Dernier." Major Falsworth went all flustered and pink, and muttered something about it being for the best that Agent Carter was not present.
Meeting Dame Peggy, even if it was before she was a Dame, it would have been an honour and a pleasure, and also too dangerous. She was the one person associated with this mission Jack might meet in the future, and she'd have seen right through any excuse that no, he just looked a lot like his father.
That's the moment where it hits him, that there's no one he can talk to about *this*. He can debrief about the mission, but there's no one he can share the glee of meeting his heroes with. They're not heroes to Earth, yet, and anyone who'd appreciate what it means to Jack hasn't been born yet, or is dead. Or hasn't been born yet and is dead. Something about that is particularly depressing to him in the moment.
Captain Rogers must notice something's wrong with him, but he doesn't say anything at the time, he waited until they shared a watch before checking that Jack was okay. "Is everything alright?" Rogers knew that Jack was a Captain without a unit. There weren't many ways that could happen, and none of them were good.
"My squad was a lot bigger before the war," was Jack's reply. Which was true, even if Jack didn't mean this war.
Rogers lets him be silent, but offers a comforting hand on the shoulders. It's exactly what Jack needs at that moment. *This* man they'd follow into the gates of Hell.
They were getting close to Jack's target, and he was having to think of ways of breaking off from the others, collecting the artefact, and joining back up without being spotted.
They were also getting close to the 107th's real target - Jack's going to feel like a real heel when he has to report to Torchwood that the Howling Commandos have targets different to the rest of the army. He'd known it anyway, from the reports they read at the Academy, but there'd always been plausible deniability, Torchwood hadn't known he'd known. Now there was no getting away from it. The trick was going to be telling them in such a way as to keep Torchwood away from Hydra so Hydra wouldn't attempt to infiltrate them once they knew about Torchwood. He's got to do it without polluting the timeline, or possibly it was already polluted, and he needed to pollute it in exactly the same way. Changing the past is a known problem with time travel, is more than half its purpose sometimes, but that doesn't stop it being a real headache thinking about it all.
Jack was still thinking of ways when Jones radioed back to base for backup. Even with all the advantages on their side, the fortress which turned out to be the Howling Commandos's target is too heavily fortified for them to attack with such small numbers.
It was a change that worked in Jack's favour. Once there are more people around, it'll be easier for him to sneak away. The problem was that while they waited for the backup to arrive, a patrol from castle found them. The firefight is unavoidable, but isn't the main problem. They’ll probably win, but someone is going to notice that the patrol hasn't come back and that's going to alert the castle garrison. That backup had better come soon.
Jack almost doesn't see the bullet that kills him. He was busy avoiding being shot by the two soldiers behind the snowdrift, and he sees their friend late, out of the corner of his eye. The enemy’s rock-grey uniforms really do work well as camouflage up here. Jack's not the soldier’s target, Rogers is, but Jack moved to get in the way of the bullet, because even with the superpowers Jack knew Rogers had, there’s no way Rogers would be able to deflect that bullet in time.
Jack's lungs are already feeling heavy by the time Rogers comes back from finishing off the third soldier. He says something about his shield, something that Jack can't hear. Jack can hear the guilt though, and tries to reassure him. "It'll be alright. Don't worry, it'll be alright." And yes, he's dying, but Jack thinks he can sound reasonably convincing about this.
~~~~
Jack came to covered by a body bag. He didn’t feel the press of earth above him so he was going to assume they haven't buried him yet. That was a plus, because even with the explosive he carried in his person for those occasions, using an explosion to exhume yourself always creates other problems while solving the first one. Jack checked his pockets for the laser-knife he carries for these occasions and finding it, lights it. It cut through the cotton bodybag-cum-shroud easily enough, and when he looked up through the eyehole he created, he could see the roof of a military ambulance. He's got fun reasons as well as bad reasons for being able to recognise the vehicle so quickly. It was a good old Dodge WC54, so he even knew whose army had picked up his body.
The ambulance was silent, and not moving. He couldn’t hear anyone else so he risked cutting himself all the way out of the bag. It turns out he wasn’t alone, but he was the only one breathing. Looking through the window, Jack could see the organised chaos that was the medical set up just behind the front lines of any battle. If he moved with enough conviction, no one would notice him. The door latch was easy enough to open, and he was out, another soldier again.
He tried to orient himself to when and where he was. Judging by the landscape, he was maybe five, six clicks back from where he died, and the fact that he's in an ambulance-cum-mortuary van told him that the backup did arrive. It means he doesn't need to feel any guilt about going off to complete his mission for Torchwood and leaving the Howling Commandos to take the castle.
Jack found the artefact easily enough, things that emit blue that's horribly reminiscent of Cherenkov radiation tend to be easy to spot. Luckily, it's a bit of Verenovi tech and he's handled enough of their stuff to know how to turn it off. It leaves him with a thing that looks like a rock, about a foot long and half a foot wide, to carry around, but at least it's not glowing anymore so he can hide it the rucksack he 'acquired' from the ambulance.
There were lots of ways he could go to get to Civitavecchia, to hand the artefact over to be delivered back to Torchwood HQ. None of them involve heading back towards the castle, but that was still the route Jack took. He tells himself it's because he knows the path will have been cleared by the fighting, that it means no one can sneak up on him. He tells himself this is the way that the artefact is least likely to end up in unready hands. It wasn’t that it was dangerous, Jack was nine and a half tenths certain it's the Verenovi equivalent of an MP3 player, but they don't have those yet on Earth so Torchwood probably is the best place for it.
Jack picked up a rifle from an over-run artillery point and defends the 107th from a distance. He sniped the soldier coming at Morita, and tells himself that it's because Morita still owes him from that last poker game, not that he'll ever be able to collect. Jack remembers his history, Jim Morita doesn't die today, all he's really doing is making sure history continues. Jack's not sure what's worse, the idea of changing history, not that he wouldn't if the other option was Jim dying, or the idea that this, everything, the Chula war ship, the Doctor and Satellite Five, were always going to happen because they always had happened.
He left for Civitavecchia once it was clear that there was no more resistance left at the castle.
~~~~
For the next spell, Jack’s job was tidying up after Allied advances. There's no good reason why North Italy and the Tyrol have so many alien artefacts - there's lots of theories, but no provable reason - but he's kept busy making sure they don't end up with anyone but Torchwood. So busy that he's distracted, worried about how to get this latest bit of tech because all the ways he's thought of so far are painful, and maybe he shouldn't have been flirting with that ambulance driver (she had the most amazing hazel eyes, he couldn't not), but either which way, he doesn't notice the Howling Commandos enter the canteen, not until he hears Duggan singing, which of course he noticed, it could wake the dead.
He made the sharpest exit he can. And he thought he was home and clear, just having to mark this down as an unfortunate occurrence and needing to change his plan of attack for getting to the latest artefact because he had to leave the area while the Commandos were there, when he walks into Captain Rogers at the backdoor of the Mess. Literally into him, because there are cannons smaller than Steve Rogers.
Rogers didn’t give him a chance to run, grabbing him by the wrists, "you died in my arms."
"Bring me a coffee and I'll explain." Truth isn't Jack's tactic of choice, and he was ashamed to say that he only decided that he was going to tell Captain Rogers some of it after ruling out all his other options. He can't cut and run, Rogers would put out an alarm which would draw far too much attention to Jack, and therefore possibly to Torchwood. He can't take Rogers in a fight - yes, he can't die but Jack'd lose every single fight even if they fought a hundred times. He can't retcon him, because goodness knew how the drug would interact with Super Soldier physiology; when it having no effect was the best outcome, it wasn't a valid strategy. That left truth.
Jack could tell that Rogers didn't want to leave him out here unguarded, but that much vaunted willingness to believe the best in people won out and Rogers went inside, returning with two coffees, or what the army calls coffees. Jack walked over to the nearest table. It was bitterly cold outside, so there's no one else stupid enough to be sitting at the outdoor tables, which gave them some privacy.
"You died in my arms," was how Rogers started the conversation again, Jack could understand why.
Jack had decided on which parts of the truth he was going to tell Rogers. He isn't going to say, 'I will be born three thousand years from now on a planet orbiting a star that's so far away that you can't even see its light from Earth, and that's the least interesting thing about me.' He knew that Rogers doesn't know about aliens yet and wouldn’t accept that as the truth. And isn't that the thing, here was Steve Rogers, early 1944, thinking all the worst had already happened to him, when it hadn't even begun to happen, and there was nothing Jack could do to stop it, and no warning he could give him, because there's no way Rogers would believe him.
"My name is Jack Harkness, and I am a Captain. If you call up US Command and get them to check with Allied Command, everything will check out. What they won't tell you is that following some scientific experimentation they never bothered to explain to me properly, I don't stay dead." It was close enough to Rogers's own story that he'd want to believe it. "If you want, you can shoot me to prove it, but I've always found that such a noisy method, especially given the present location. You can stab me in the heart, force the knife you're carrying straight through my ribcage, it'll hurt like hell, but a few hours later, I'm back and right as rain."
"And we've not heard about this how?"
"If the US developed the technology to create undying soldiers, do you think it would tell the world?" Rogers nodded, it was a fair enough point, the super soldier sitting in front of Jack not having mentioned his own quirks in any of this. "They got it to work once. Every attempt since kills people. Doesn't seem to stop them trying though." Jack thought he got the tone right, that snapping anger, barely concealed behind morbid good humour. He doesn't say he watched holovideos of Captain Rogers growing up, wanting to be him, and that he's sure he learned the tone from him.
Jack can see the questions Captain Rogers was thinking of, questions Jack can't answer because Jack has no idea what it felt like for other people or if there's anything after, he doesn’t stay dead long enough to find out. He has become vividly aware that his experiences aren't everyone's. Starting with waking up shocked on Satellite Five, the only one there left alive, he hadn't known how he'd survived, maybe luck was a lady after all. The next time, he wrote off as luck again, the third time, he couldn't. Simple poison isn't on his top five worst ways to die anymore, but that time, it raced right to the top.
If he had a limited number of revivals he'd used up more of them then than even the Torchwood ladies had when he'd fallen through the Rift and into Victorian Cardiff.
"What it feels like" is the easiest question to answer and that’s impossible too.
But Rogers doesn’t ask any of those questions. Something soft comes over Rogers's face instead, soft and melancholy. "You'll get out of this. No matter what else happens, you will get out of this alive."
Jack's got no reason to think he'll die, true, but Rogers doesn't know about aliens, and their artefacts, that might leave Jack in a state no-one would call alive, even if he wasn't dead. "Call it a good chance that I will."
"If I give you a letter, can you make sure that Agent Carter gets it? If it's necessary." Jack knows what the necessity Rogers can't bring himself to speak of is. Jack can't promise that he'll get the letter to Agent Carter, because who knows what'll happen between, he wants to get it to her so much because it’s Captain Rogers asking, but he won't let himself let Steve Rogers down with a promise he can’t keep.
"I'll do everything I can." Rogers nodded, he understood what Jack was promising. He's not saying he will do it, but the only reason the letter won't reach Agent Carter is if Jack's dead or so incapacitated he can't give it to someone else to pass on. He'll guard it like he guards his dog tags and his boots.
Rogers went back into the canteen, asking Jack to stay where he was with nothing more than a hand action. Jack felt the rush of warmth as the door open, and the sound of the people inside happily chattering away. It makes the ice-blue cold out there feel worse. Jack was pondering the likelihood of hypothermia, and exactly how warm the ambulance driver would feel against him, even though almost nothing on Earth would get him to leave where he's been put, when Rogers came back with some paper and a refill for the coffee.
Rogers writes quickly but neatly, even while Jack tries not to read what he's writing.
If ever there were a time to tell Rogers what was about to happen it was now. Jack wanted to, wants to warn him, but he can't, because years ago from now he swore an oath. The Time Agency for all its lies, flaws and hypocrisy, had been set up to stop meddling with the past by people from a future with time travel, no matter how well meant the interference was. There were probably some people in history where you could tell them exactly what would happen and no matter what their choices, it wouldn't interfere with the shape of history. Too many of the horrible things that were going to happen to Steve Rogers were tied up with the fate of the planet to risk telling him anything. All the things that either of them had ever believed in stopped Jack.
When Steve handed him the letter, it felt thick inside its envelope. "I'd say come inside but ..." Rogers trailed off.
"Don't worry. It's sort of an occupational hazard. I worry that one day I'm going to have to pretend to be my twin brother to be able to go anywhere."
Jack turned and walked away, he didn't look back, he didn't even try to find the tent he thought the nurse was staying in. Best to leave the camp entirely and avoid detection.
The letter weighed heavily on his conscience, leaving Jack constantly checking that he still had it, that it hadn’t fallen out of his coat. He checked at least once every day. He knew exactly how long it would be before he would have to come up with a plan of getting it to Agent Carter. He used the time to figure out a way of doing it without being detected. He settled for hiding in plain sight - right then, no one was going to notice another man in uniform coming into or out of headquarters. The tricky thing, it turned out, was being in London at the same time as Agent Carter, without Torchwood One or George finding out.
The letter was intact when it arrived on Agent Carter’s desk, neatly stamped FYEO. However tempted Jack might have been, he didn't tamper with the gum seal. Given all the things he's done, it was ridiculous that this is where he drew a line but it was the fact that it was personal, and that the weight of the world doesn't depend on it that stops him, this will stay between Steve and Peggy. Jack had no idea if this is one of the letters that survives and makes it into the history books he read; even if he's left his fingerprints on it, the Time Agency have placed worms in systems throughout history that will mean no link will ever been made between him and it. Jack likes the idea of that, some piece of history untouched by Torchwood, or the Time Agency or any of the other things that distort people into heroes and villains. Jack has been lucky enough to meet Steve Rogers and he’s better than that.
End notes: The original prompt, suggested by someone, goodness knows who, was "Captain America/Captain Jack because Steve really is Jack's type", and precisely because of that, it morphed into Cap + Jack, because of that, because let's be honest Jack/cheerful self-loathing is always his main pairing.
After this (what counts for me) spate of fics, I suspect the next one will be some time coming, since everything I'm working on is long or complicate or long *and* complicated.
